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A Letter to President Zardari Mr. President of Pakistan,
London, UK

Dear Mr. President,

I hope that you are in perfect health and enjoying the time of your life in London. And expect you to be enjoying the drizzle there, unlike the rest of us. You went away for just a week or so, but we missed you so much that we counted each and every moment. As a consequence, we prolonged our own agony while anticipating your return. This further aggravated our restlessness and doubtlessly increased your love in our hearts. I, especially, became so impatient that I couldn't stop myself from writing this letter.

So, first of all, let me congratulate you on your "successful" visit. Rumours are that it was a disaster but who cares about those chattering media personnel. They are against you anyway. Therefore, I would take for granted, the word of our beloved information minister which, to me, is second only to The Divine Message. And although, Media and establishment tried their best to impede your way by their "propaganda" but you showed them "what" you are made of (by not listening to anyone). So far, that's the best quality which manifested in your ever evolving and revolving personality

By the way did you hear about what happened in Pakistan after your departure? Mr. Syed Raza Haider of MQM was shot dead and Karachi started burning after that. So far, 100 people have died in these ethnic killings. PM reached Karachi a day before yesterday. He probably travelled on foot as air travel isn't so safe any more. I don't want to ruin your entertainment packed trip but I must inform you about the floods too. News agencies reported that upto 14 million Pakistanis lost everything they owned including around 1500 of their relatives. Pretty nice statistics right! I would suggest that it's a great opportunity for you to collect more "aid".

I saw your pictures with Mr. Cameron and absolutely loved your grinning. One must say that it is a sign of true leadership. Only a person like you can chuckle when the whole nation is in shock and grief. I also heard about the warm welcome you received from the overseas Pakistanis. There, I spotted a placard too, which stated "GO ZARDARI GO" and I am sure it must have boosted your morale. I, myself, experience the same feeling when I hear my enthusiastic friends raising slogans, while running with the ball in my feet.

And oh, I heard about that shoe throwing incident. To be very frank, I knew it was going to happen someday. My friends and I, were quite optimistic that Bush's feat is not going to stay unmatched as long as you are in power. Now, we can also boast about the shoe throwing games on facebook depicting our president. I was thinking about challenging my States' friends on "who can get more hits".

But, I wonder why Mr. Farhat Ullah Babar denied this incident and why did some other official call it a publicity stunt? I think you are already publicized to the brim. However, to be honest, I was also upset at the same time since our PM didn't take "notice" of this incident. Nevertheless, It was very pleasing to hear about the valiant attacks of PPP jyalas (juhlaas) on hawkers and cable operators. That reminded me of the fearlessness of German Gestapo.

Thus, in short, I would say that your visit resulted in a great accomplishment despite all the efforts by the establishment and media to malign you, and you rose up to the mark in spite of immense pressure. You also collected a lot of funds for relief work. And I absolutely agree with your statement that it's the job of Chief Executive to look after the state affairs. It reminded me of the old times when kings used to know nothing about their people. And it made a lot of sense to me. After all, we should be reviving the glorious old traditions.

So I would recommend that whenever, God forbade, we are hit by a disaster in future, our PM should be the one roaming in the streets and visiting "fake" hospitals and relief camps. While you should do, what you do best, which is....collecting money.

Eraj Khan zardari london